Reginald's Rap
Raw Dump
He wouldn't do it outside his opium den -- that would be disrespectful!
Gregory has a Gentleman's disguise
Alice is Lady in Black
The problem is if you walk, there's a chance someone might be dumb enough to mug you.
S: Taking a carriage is a public service
Could a large animal be seen boarding with Gregory so that if he turns into a large animal there won't be so much confusion.
I think that could be arranged,
Returning a lion to Africa.
I don't know what I can do that's useful at the moment?
Court Angelina, maybe?
Oh, yes, I could do that.
Can that be Mace saying that?
No, the correct answer is "Is the wall still there?"
Whom you did not realize was your boyfriend last niht
That was during the day. Midafternoon at the latest!
You want me to make him a genius
Or he could be just as clever as I am. That would also be all right
A genius intellect
Father please make Talos clever
Clever enough to find lost people
No, that's not what I was asking
And I was thinking it would be quite pleasurable to have your company.
Are you making saving the world into a date?
Yes! I am!
What were you doing in such a den of vice?
Paying a debt. But I think I was perfectly safe there.
I start a small thundercloud over the club. It is easir to get his attention
The Knight symbol!
There appears to be a small thunderstorm.
This is London, Mr. Knight
Yes, I'm aware of that. I'm afraid I'll have to talk to your father some other time. I'm afraid Sophronia is Doing Something...
I hope Sophronia hasn't happened to anyone...
Why am I the only person who prepares for these things?
Because you don't care about politeness.
True, I don't.
Ad it woud make my lovelife more complicated
I go through the hole in the wall and see --
A very startled black panther
Do I have time to duck?
No, this is an attack.
Really?
This is the fairy earl -- that's obviously one of his fairy cats.
3
5
Bloody hell, Alice! It's me!
Oh! I thought it was one of his guards! Are you sure it's you?
It seems the Earl Ashenbert thought kidnapping me was a good way to make me come with him to Scotland. I think it was very rude of him.
There are several fish who turn into mermaids and swim the hell away from you.
I shall go to my cousin
Clearly. This is a social attack
Alice, have we not learned our lesson about going to your cousin
Telling him about crazy people looking into the martian crystal worked out pretty well
Not helping, Victor!
Which of them shall we keep an eye on?
Well... I'll go to the earl's house
I don't want to deal with Winston. I'll come with you.
Have fun. If she needs to, I'll break her out of her room later.
Maneuver to put a consequence:
This is Not How This Was Supposed to Go
I begin to be convinced that it's not the Earl
Oh, it's not the earl
Alice, does this mean you don't want me to set his house on fire?
Have you set his house on fire?
Not yet.
Oh good. I was afraid you had done something disproportionate.
...You must have me confused with some other fairy.
If you wish to break things off with the earl, you have the opportunity. However, should you wish to stand by him, I will understand.
Who is more trouble than this earl? I am sure it is someone who is more trouble.
Since the man in question has now expressed an interest, I think it only appropriate that you should know.
Much merriment so that she get fp
Clink. Clink. Clink.
Oh, I don't deserve that many
Yes, I was afraid of that.
You realize the earl is a better match and needs you more.
No I do not believe I am more competent than Mr. Creighton
I am however more powerful
Oh you are right, those are different words
Winston compel -- I will not let the family down -- and neither will anyone else.
Here's my plan. It's a crzy plan but it might work.
Is she holding iron when she sleeps?
I don't think so. She's my friend
I'll fix it
Victor, you must stop sneaking into ladies' bedrooms
All that woud have been sensisle. I should have thought of going to sleep with my arms wrapped around a poker myself, which Josh did, but Alice didnt
I shall have to hire... well, is Mr. Knight available or should I hire Mr. Moreland?
Oh, I think I know how to handle that mysef -- I'll be discreet
Any other messages I should take?
Oh yes, I did break off in the middle of a converstion with Angelina -- 'll take care of it later
Mama is certain this will not be a problem
He's not sure if he wants to go for brash and bold, which is what the family needs
Alice: I have a plan
Victor: This is going to be a disaster
I have been to faerie twice
Who do we know who is an expert on artifacts
There is mr merriman
Excellent. As is the coffee.
Flalice and Flace repairers of reputations or Ermine and Raven
We'll have the faeries ride herd over the fleople
Oh yes because that can't go bad
I believe he has a proposition for you as well
Ah, I don't want to marry him right now
Oh, I think he wasnts to hire you
Oh, in that case I should go
Although if you chane your mind, let me know
I mean it's been some hours. You must have come up with something.
He is a powerful fae. This will take some time.
Reginal's Rap
Well. That explains a lot
So I _dont_ have to be Lady P
Probably
You had to mention that
Well this explins tht whold converstaion about secrets taht could ruin peopels lives
by the way what makes you think the loss...
Shouldnt you have given them more time to prepare for the fact that they won't have Lord G?
Wotking on that
Working on that how?
...Possibility number one...
I would not make much of a lady in either case, you must agree
Well Reginald does not make much of a gentleman?
True! Why, did you notice...
While this is going on, Reginald is still pouring tea and all the tea service
Return of G
G/R plus S
Archibald
Boys, you know how to fight. Pick up your dice!
I always go to the fight too early!
Yes, but I want to actually hit you.
Good thing I knew you were a liar. I would have been much more put out.
Mr. Hunter, you are a liar and a fake and I already knew that. I will have to think about whether to accept your apology. Good day.
Victor, have this conversation in an hour.
Why? Because you're going to leave now!
Right. So I am. Don't destroy the room.
That went. More or less as I expected.
And how are you?
This entire time?
Yes.
I suppose I'm just going to have to take you as you are
Plan one: Lord Mace and I secretly elope and go off to Africa and plan to repair his reputation after our return
Plan two: Lord Mace -- Damn. Both of these plans involve elopement, on't they. Aid the F Earl with his matter and his servants make brief but ocas appreances at W's direction in orer to repair our rep while we galiv in Scotland and then in Afr before retireing --- no go off on honeymoon...
We ignored each other at the opera today. It was quite lovely.
We're still best friends ev if your fightin with Reginald
Of course we are (hug) I just don't know what to think of him. Who is he?
These really are very complicated plans alice
The third one isn't
The third one isnt a plan. That isn't waht the word means
Have you conidered just marrying him?
Yes of course. That's waht plan three is.
Yes Alice of course alice good night alice
are we still best friends
yes of course
Reginald's Rap
Dear friends, some of you May have thought for some time That the face that I wear Isn’t properly mine ALT VERSION FOR “LIVE” PRESENTATION Now this is a story All about how My life was rather turned upside down If you’ll grant me but a moment Please pull up a chair I'll tell you why I took the place Of the Pensington Heir In a humble hunter’s cottage I was born and raised On Pensinton lands I spent most of my days Learning to serve And be seen and not heard But my dear master Greg Thought that was rather absurd Though master and servant We were destined to be We confounded those plans With childish glee Every skill that was learned Was shared fair for fair With my friend and my brother The Pensington Heir We were taught how to hunt To observe and extract From our targets, those skills That would aid our attack In the boardroom or the scullery In the woods, at a ball We discovered that together We could master it all We learned we could assume New personas with ease Imitating one another Or whomever we pleased If anything I’d say that These talents were rare That were shared by this servant And the Pensington Heir A deep hunter's trance Can imperil a mind So we went to the Congo A new mentor to find The chief's daughter Aya And wise master Mai He taught us to shift And she caught Gregory's eye As we grew in our powers They grew in their love They fit quite as well As a hand in a glove A dark warrior princess No meek maiden fair The one true love of The Pensington Heir Our new family needs Greg In our African home But Pensington needs someone To be in line for its throne Should a new Heir be chosen? Could their children come here? Can we counter the reactions of Suspicion and fear? So back to the isles I've returned to arrange A way to make the best Of this alliance so strange Though I wear my friend's face I remain, I do swear Reg Hunter, loyal servant Of the Pensington Heir I've deceived you, my friends And with no little shame I hope you can forgive me For concealing my name If you're reading these words Then I’m in over my head I’m in need of your help If not already dead ALT VERSION FOR “LIVE” PRESENTATION And now it goes further For I must ask your aid I don’t know how long I can maintain this charade To protect all my families Ah, here's the rub I'm going to need the help Of the Kerberos Club And the best way to help them I sincerely declare Is to make the right plan And to make it with care But we do this right Then I think that we might Find a way we can fight For the black and the white But the time’s getting tight To make their future bright And Lord help the poor sod Who winds up with the job So I beg you, please help me Find someone who’ll be there Who can sit on the throne As the Pensington Heir Alternate verses We traveled to through Great Britain And then overseas We assumed new personas With the greatest of ease We studied our targets Made their powers our own We hunted and reveled Both abroad and at home In Missouri I deeply imperiled my mind And out dear ally Abe Was a fortunate find He found us a shaman They brought my spirit back home But I ramble For this part of the story is known So back to the isles With many a care I returned to play the part Of the Pensington Heir So he stayed in the Congo And I came back home And without him, I confess I feel rather alone But my families needs me No, let me speak with more care Someone must fill the role Of the Pensington Heir To my friends I have lied And it fills me with shame That it only is now That you know my true name
Aftermath
V: Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
S: Victor.
V: So that’s why I don’t think this was a good idea in the first place....
S: Victor.
V: And if you had really considered the matter...
S: Victor! Have this conversation in an hour.
V: Why?
S: Because you’re leaving now.
V: Oh, right.
Victor leaves.
R: Well, that went... about like I expected.
S: (blinks)
R: Are you all right?
S: All this time?
R: I’m afraid so. (Long pause) I made commitments to people who were important to me, in order to protect my home, who are now far away. I failed to anticipate the commitments I would acquire to people who are...nearer, and dearer.
R: I’m afraid so. (Long pause) I made certain decision in order to protect the people I care about, people who are hundreds or thousands of miles away. I failed to anticipate the effect it would have on people who are... closer to me. People who... became more dear to me than I had expected.
S: And you’re not going to do this again?
R: Sorry? Um, no, this is really me.
S: So your name is...Reginald?
R (reaches out one finger to shake Sphronia’s hand): Yes... a pleasure to finally meet you.
S: Do you think you could possibly assume your cat form for a little while?
R: Of course.
Curl up together on the table, Reg drags a saucer milk over, they discuss Victor’s plans to bring Angelina to Africa with them.
Reginald POV
Your Majesty, Princess Aya, Protector of the Bambenga, The Leopard’s Claw, Chosen of Kaliki, Lady Sage, and Her Royal Consort, Prince Gregory, Heir of Pensington, The Hunting Ghost, Disciple of Anansi, Lord Sage,
I hope this letter finds you well, as well as His Majesty your father, and the rest of Bambenga, particularly our Master Mai.
Frankly, I hope this letter is able to find you at all. I’ve received no confirmation that any of my attempts at correspondence have successfully reached you, which has been frustrating, if not unexpected.
Additionally, I must apologize for the even greater than usual gap between letters. My fellow Kerbians and I took a brief trip to Fairy, which turned out to have cost us a year in this world. Distressing, though again, not unexpected.
(Incidentally, I swear by Anansi’s exploding cigars that this letter marks is the last time I use your full titles in the address. The next letter can be addressed to The Royal Rutting Ferrets for all I care, even if it might be the first one that arrives).
I’ve been trying to arrange for one of your siblings to take the responsibility of Heir from our shoulders, or for one of them to marry someone who could do so. No luck so far. Pensington still need “Gregory” to be the heir, but things are not entirely hopeless. When in comes to future Grand-High-Cat-Herder (as your mother is accustomed to call it), the young Lord Farnsby (Carmarthen) is a surprisingly viable candidate, being of strong will, sharp mind, and just a bit touched in the head, much like the best of our clan. I really must speak with Lady Farnsby, as her feelings, and her ambitions and talents, toward Emile and/or Archibald could have a significant effect on the outcome of my endeavours.
Should Your Highness return to England at some point, I hope that I have laid some groundwork to ease your arrival and facilitate your welcome. It is now the conventional wisdom that the next Lady Pensington needs to be exotic and bold. Also, “Gregory” is now courting Sophonia, who is certainly exotic and bold, but not precisely the same species as the rest of the the family. I hope this will cause people to perceive Your Highness as charmingly exotic by comparison, rather than shockingly so. I’m must confess that, rather than deliberately creating a terribly clever ruse, I’ve tried to make a virtue of necessity, since my own courtship of Sophronia is quite real.
While we are attempting to embark on an overseas journey to track down some miscreants, which should, I hope, give me an opportunity to come find you in person, we have found ourselves delayed by a series of comitragic misadventures. Lord Beauchamp is insisting that that his cousin be married before she leave, and as Alice and George have finally gotten around to courting each other in earnest instead of dancing around the subject like a pair of Peafowl, we need to reform his reputation. Our new acquaintance Lord Ashenberg has returned to claim the seat of the Fairy Earl, and needs to find an ancestral sword lost somewhere between Scotland and Faire. He want’s Alice’s help with that, and now there are other fey trying to kidnap her and trick her into finding the sword for them. I’m afraid at least one such fairy is rather frighteningly good with their illusions and disguises.
The threat of another accomplished mimic has exacerbated my worries about relying on friends who don’t actually know me for who I am. In addition, I’m no longer willing to court Sophronia under false pretenses. Accordingly, I’ve chosen to reveal my true identity to her, Alice, Victor, and George. It went over exactly as well as one might expect, I’m sorry to say. Victor will no doubt use the flaws in our scheme as another way to torment me for the rest of my days, but appears to bear me no lasting ill will. Sophronia, bless and love her, seems to have already forgiven me, or is at least delaying my day of reckoning until some later date. I expect George will come round (our arrangement probably seem delightfully transgressive to him) provided his lady love does as well.
And therein lies the rub. Lady Beauchamp was entirely undone by my revelation, and made her displeasure known in no uncertain terms (my head is still ringing from that slap) . In addition to the emotional shock to which I subjected all of my friends, I suspect that I have delivered a blow to Lady Beauchamp’s rather, would it be fair to say brittle? understanding of proper class relations. “Lord Sage” may have occupied a place in her affections which she reserves for those she considers her social equals, a place to which a lowborn fellow such as Mr. Hunter would never be admitted. I may never be able to repair our friendship, but perhaps she will permit me to relate to her if I follow a much more proper set of protocols. Do you suppose the ancient Martians made use of Janissaries, or servants with similar duties?
In any event, we will, I hope, soon be seeing you in person, and I will have the opportunity to introduce you to those Kerbians who are still speaking to me. Do keep an eye out for a shifty bastard with a magical crystal raving about visions from Mars, and his friends, described in the attached document. He may cause you a spot of bother, but if you can instead locate the quarry, perhaps we will have the opportunity to hunt him down together, just like the old days.
I remain, as ever, your Faithful Servant and Subject, and Dear Friend, Reginald
